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The Silent Note of the Coldest Night

by Shroud Of Despondency

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1.
Through lips of snow came flames Unheard, unseen,and rarely felt by our skin But I felt the heat as I knelt to pray His peaceful words meant nothing This day, rejoice, I'll never forget This day, rejoice, is mine It belongs to only me, for he is dead This day, rejoice, a rebel won the war And every God will sleep forevermore Like in the silence of the ashes To dwell here is deafening Maddening, enchanting, divine In senseless understanding This day, rejoice, I'll never forget This day, rejoice, is mine It belongs to only me, for he is dead This day, rejoice, a rebel won the war And every God will sleep forevermore Every God will sleep forevermore Every God will sleep forevermore So run to the point of no return, then fall to your knees Then rise to where all is nothing-in peace.
2.
The first fire on the water, set by the moon Silver flames on the ripples dancing to jump the shoreline Bear witness to the beginning of our doom They will jump the shoreline with the will to consume Tremble like the reflection of the moon on the rippling waters of time Tremble like the reflection of the moon on the rippling waters in darkness Tremble The first fire on the water, set by the moon Silver flames growing upward and outward into the night I can stand on the shore, content, indifferent I will be everything when the flames consume Tremble like the reflection of the moon on the rippling waters of time Tremble like the reflection of the moon on the rippling waters in darkness Tremble The world will be carried away in distress Rushing along with a violent rush of death On the flooded river of suffering Which the foam of disease oversprays Which has old age as its' purge Which enlightens the darkest of days With one last cathartic surge The world will be carried away in distress Rushing along with a violent rush of death On the flooded river of suffering Which the foam of disease oversprays Which has old age as its' purge Which enlightens the darkest of days With one last cathartic surge The last fire on the water, set by the moon The last fire on the water, set by the moon The last fire on the water, set by the moon The last fire on the water, set by the moon I will be everything when the flames consume
3.
Spit Out 07:50
Anxiousness descends and spreads Spit out by one and consumed by many Anxiousness descends and spreads Candles, designed to guide, but lacking original flame Emanate the light of a born again saint He has murdered and I am in his shadow I once held the hand of my neighbor When I have murdered that treacherous shadow I'll give him back to the arms of his savior And rid myself of anxiousness Anxiousness descends and spreads Spit out by one and consumed by many Anxiousness descends and spreads Candles, designed to guide, but lacking original flame Emanate the light of a born again saint He has murdered and I am in his shadow I once held the hand of my neighbor When I have murdered that treacherous shadow I'll give him back to the arms of his savior And rid myself of anxiousness Of what sustenance are you? How life has been given to feed your spring To make your water shine blue in the black of night And still you speak of suffering? Of what sustenance are you? How life has been given to feed your spring To make your water shine blue in the black of night And still you speak of suffering? Yet anxiousness descends and spreads Yet anxiousness descends and spreads Yet anxiousness descends and spreads Yet anxiousness descends and spreads
4.
Above all wisdom Plague in an endless gust Beneath all wisdom Shadows of the illusions of freedom Enslaved by love Chained to the beautiful cross Maimed by wisdom And left to future grave moss We are love Above all wisdom Plague in an endless gust Beneath all wisdom Shadows of the illusions of freedom Enslaved by love Chained to the beautiful cross Maimed by wisdom And left to future grave moss We are love
5.
I am faithful to the shadows To anything that leads to the end of the trail Where the forest opens up and starlight shines through For sunlight would only blind me and I would be lost Waiting for life anew I am learning to love what I am told I should not Alone in the forest at night Any absence of color is betrayal of thought For it circumvents the dark light I am faithful to the shadows To anything that leads to the end of the trail Where the forest opens up and starlight shines through For sunlight would only blind me and I would be lost Waiting for life anew I am learning to love what I am told I should not Alone in the forest at night Any absence of color is betrayal of thought For it circumvents the dark light I am faithful to the shadows I am faithful to the shadows and the thoughts of the winter breeze Thankful for the notion of a colorless eternity In pure blackness or a snow-blind destiny I am free to breathe
6.
This Deceit 06:42
A conversation with a man that isn't present A detailed discussion between subversive breaths Lashing tongues then gnashing teeth The cycle of all belief Now I must forgive myself for this deceit It pains me as if it were the mother of all pain It loves me, evades my better judgement towards disdain In delusion fatherly love is shame And is something that must be attacked Converse with the need to converse with the ghosts Converse with the need to converse with the Gods A conversation with a man that wasn't present A memory of shackles and chains of false faith Still after abrogation The cycle of subjugation Now I must never the past, even this deceit It pains me as if it were the mother of all pain It loves me, evades my better judgement towards disdain In delusion fatherly love is shame And is something that must be attacked Converse with the need to converse with the ghosts Converse with the need to converse with the Gods Heresy, a gift unto thee Question everything Heresy, in the name of thy self.
7.
I have bled where the water bleeds the rivers A sacrifice to the waves and where they land I have suffered My only blood tasted by the tongue of the shoreline Exchanged in honor for the privilege of the flame I have drown In silver flames Transcendental anguish Each silver flame Consequential shivers Embrace me Change me Wash over me In pain I have bled where the water bleeds the rivers A sacrifice to the waves and where they land I have suffered My only blood tasted by the tongue of the shoreline Exchanged in honor for the privilege of the flame I have drown In silver flames Transcendental anguish Each silver flame Consequential shivers Embrace me Change me Wash over me In pain Wash over me with pain With pride With death " It's not worth the tears of that one tortured child who beat itself on the breast with its little fist and prayed in its stinking outhouse, with its unexpiated tears to 'dear, kind God'! It's not worth it, because those tears are unatoned for. They must be atoned for, or there can be no harmony. But how? How are you going to atone for them? Is it possible? By their being avenged? But what do I care for avenging them? What do I care for a hell for oppressors? What good can hell do, since those children have already been tortured? And what becomes of harmony, if there is hell? I want to forgive. I want to embrace. I don't want more suffering." Taken from Dostoevsky's "The Brothers Karamazov"
8.
There is nothing here Only stillness, only stars Only deprivation Rushing towards the earth Seen only by the highest eye There is no time When the silent notes of the coldest night(there is no time) Echo down the spine of all life(there is no time) Then there will be solace(there is no time) Then, and only then, can there be solace There is nothing here Only stillness, only stars Only deprivation Rushing towards the earth Seen only by the highest eye There is no time When the silent notes of the coldest night(there is no time) Echo down the spine of all life(there is no time) Then there will be solace(there is no time) Then, and only then, can there be solace There is something lost There is nothing new There was never an "I" There was never a "you" Towards eternity gazes the highest eye Towards eternity gazes the highest eye Towards eternity gazes the highest eye Towards eternity gazes the highest eye

about

Blemberg and I put some very late and long nights into recording this album in 2011 and 2012. It was thought to have been lost after a very limited, and awful sounding, version was released in 2012. In 2020 I found it on an old desktop computer and began resampling the drums to improve the mix. I then decided I wanted to perfect the guitars, so I re-recorded them. I put in 10 sessions over 2 weeks, each lasting 3-4 hours, in order to re record all the guitars. So the bass, vocals, and programming were all recorded 8 years before the guitars. There are technically three different versions of this album. This is the best one.

Although the cover is Lake Superior, most of the lyrics were written after long night walks with my dogs on the shore of Lake Michigan. The moon's reflection on the water was the inspiration for most of the lyrics.

Praise be to the 6 string guitar in standard tuning and black metal from the 90s.

credits

released March 14, 2020

Rory Heikkila-All instruments and drum programming
Ron Blemberg-All vocals

Special guests:
N.M-extra vocals on "River of Suffering" and "This Deceit" and the spoken word reading in "Silver Flames." The passage was taken from Dostoevsky's "The Brothers Karamazov"


Very special thanks to Ryan Bartelme for allowing me to use his Epiphone Les Paul Classic during the first recording sessions for this album. Its quality tone and neck undoubtedly influenced the creation of this album and the overall feeling of the riffs I was able to compose.

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Shroud Of Despondency Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Shroud of Despondency was formed by Rory Heikkila in the late 1990's.

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